From Awkward to Awesome: 4 proven tactics to increase your charisma virtually
How would you rate yourself on a scale from 1 to 7 with 1 being awkward and 7 being charismatic? Leaders that are highly charismatic are better able to inspire and influence their teams. People are drawn to them. People want to collaborate with them. This makes them more effective.
A series of studies from Princeton University found that as much as 82% of people’s impression of you is based on how charismatic you are [1] and that this impression is formed in less than the first second of engagement! [2]
Charisma, they discovered, is a balance between warmth and competence. Your warmth is what makes people feel like they can trust you. Your competence is what makes them feel like they can rely on you.
Whether you’re a leader looking to inspire your team, or an individual contributor trying to influence others then we need to talk about your perceived charisma.
Are leaders simply born with charisma and confidence? The simple answer is no. Charisma is not innate and in fact it can be taught. Read on for some tips to help you craft it, even in a virtual environment.
4 Tactics to Boost your Charisma in a Virtual Environment
1. Don’t Stand so Close to Me
How far away is your face from your camera? The ideal (in North America) is to place yourself 1 to 1.5 feet from the camera. When you’re less than a foot away and your face dominates the screen your teammates may be left feeling like they need to pull back or move away. Whatever the social norm, maintaining a personal bubble applies even in the virtual world. Sitting back slightly also means you have more space to work hand gestures into the meeting, which puts people at ease and improves information retention. [3]
For those of us that struggle with the warmth aspect of charisma, the next two tips are especially helpful.
2. Hands Up!
When you first jump on the call, give people a wave. Showing your hand (preferably with an open palm) puts people at ease. Our brains are always scanning our environment for threats and when we can’t see someone’s hands there’s a part of us left wondering if someone is holding a dangerous object.
“Our hands are a nonverbal way to show and build trust – studies have found that when we see someone’s hands, we have an easier time trusting them.” [4]
3. Flash a Smile 🙂
After the wave, exude warmth by flashing a real smile and tilting your head. A genuine smile will put people at ease and boost your perceived intelligence! “[...] in our research we found that the longer a TED speaker smiled, the higher their perceived intelligence ratings were. Those who smiled at least 14 seconds were rated as higher in intelligence than those who smiled for less.” [4]
If the idea of smiling on a Zoom call makes you want to hide under a blanket, then you can simply maintain a neutral position with your face, but look directly into the camera when you say “Hello.” This is a great stand in for actual eye contact since people will feel like you are looking directly at them.
For those of us that struggle with being perceived as competent, this last tip is especially helpful.
4. Do You Like Me???
Pay particular attention to the inflection of your voice at the end of a sentence. Do you ever add the uptick of a question at the end of a statement when there is no question?
For example, when introducing yourself do you say, “Hi, I’m Amanda!” or “Hi, I’m Amanda?”
If so, you are inviting others to scrutinize what you are saying rather than listen openly. Adding a question mark with your voice where it doesn’t belong makes it sound like you question your own authority, which does not instill confidence.
Behind this uptick is the real question of “Do you agree with me? Do you like me?” So get your head in the right space before the meeting as you remind yourself that you do not need everyone to like you and you don’t need everyone to agree with you.
These 4 things - sufficient space, hand gestures, a real smile, and removing upward inflections - are crucial tactics to create the right balance of warmth and competence that make up charisma. Test these out in your next meeting to boost your influence and impact.
References:
Susan T. Fiske, et al. (2007). Universal dimensions of social cognition: warmth and competence. Trends in Cognitive Sciences, 11(2), 77083. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.tics.2006.11.005.
Willis, J., & Todorov, A. (2006). First Impressions: Making Up Your Mind After a 100-Ms Exposure to a Face. Psychological Science, 17(7), 592–598. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-9280.2006.01750.x
Kang, S., Tversky, B. From hands to minds: Gestures promote understanding. Cogn. Research 1, 4 (2016). https://doi.org/10.1186/s41235-016-0004-9
Vanessa Van Edwards. https://www.scienceofpeople.com/5-secrets-of-a-successful-ted-talk/
